Continue reading at your own risk. For some reason I feel comfortable sharing my heart here... So you may get more of my emotions than you bargained for.
After many attempts, today finally brought a phone call with the caseworker of Gabe II. I wasn't surprised by what she had to say after our Skype meeting was abruptly canceled last month. This young man is having a rough time with the idea of adoption. He is acting out in response to the anxiety he's feeling and is running through a grief cycle that is spinning out of control. His caseworker doesn't even want to mention adoption to him at this time until his mind and heart slow down a little.
I prayed that something would move forward or the door would close completely. I felt like that door was closed while we were having our conversation today.
And maybe the door is closed.
But I don't think so.
I'm a thousand times more convinced now than ever that this boy is meant to be a part of our family. It's out of my hands... But holy cow poo, Batman, I'm praying hard for him. He doesn't know it yet. And I'm not sure if his case worker knows it yet. But God has plans for this boy and I'm going to beg God until He tells me to stop or shows me another plan.
You can only begin to imagine what he is going thru with making a huge desision like adoption. If it doesnt happen you willgo on with another baby. But he will never create that child ever again. Once he has lost to afoption. Thats it for his chance to be a father to his child thatis growing in the mommmies tummy. I dont know details sojust writing about the life changer adoption loss will be to him. He has to live whatever desision he makes.
ReplyDeleteWe are looking to adopt a child out of the foster care system.
DeleteSorry. I justrefreshed myself with more of your story. I see its not a baby. Still a lot of emotions going on.
ReplyDelete