Here We Are Again

I haven't used this space since K's adoption was finalized.

It didn't seem like a spot I needed.

But here we are again. And people have questions that I can't post all over the interwebs.

So here it goes...

We weren't planning to add another child. There was a brief conversation about it last year, but we decided it wasn't the best idea at that point in time. The piles of application paperwork were tucked away.

Our 3- unless a child was dropped on our doorstep. That has always been the exception.

We have kept an open relationship with K's birth family. We've had ongoing visits, phone calls, texts, etc. Part of that birth family is a little sister- A. While they haven't seen each other that often, they have an incredibly close bond. There are a bunch of other half siblings around, but A is the only one that K has a significant attachment to.

Around Christmas, we began to notice some behavior changes in the birth family. It was obvious that something was going on, so we limited visits and contact until we could figure out what it was. As time progressed, we heard comments that indicated that A was not receiving the best of care.

Between March and April, our home had some conversations about what it would look like if we were asked to take her. It was increasingly clear that she probably wouldn't be able to stay in the home.

...

On a Saturday night in May, we got a call from extended family asking us to come and pick A up. Some really ugly things were happening, and she needed to be elsewhere for her safety. With the help of DHS, we came to an agreement that we would pick her up on Monday and have her for a 10 day safety plan while things got reorganized in her home.

As many of you know, it has now been 70 days and she has not left. At the end of that safety plan, she was placed with us as a foster care placement.

...

While I would like to be able to say that things are getting better with the birth family, they are currently far worse. There are no plans for A to return home in the near future, if at all.

It has been a beautiful and incredibly difficult 70 days. Trauma is hard... and there is plenty of it in our home. We're thankful for the grace that people have offered us as we do the next best thing every single day.